…Still no flying cars.

So 2008 is nearly done.  How crazy is that, huh?  I can’t believe how quick this year flew by.  So in light of that, lets take a look back on all the lessons I’ve learned this year!

• When a container of cottage cheese says it expires on a specific date, go ahead and take its word, that date does not have a whole lot of “wiggle” room.
• Under no circumstances should you ever “get busy” in the living room with the blinds open.  Those poor, poor kids.
• Remember that as soon as you make that last payment on your car, Fate’s gonna be gunnin’ for it, full speed.  In some cases, you won’t even make it past the month of your last payment.
• Rock Band 2 should be played standing up, unless you’re playing the drums.  Anyone who tells you otherwise doesn’t own Rock Band 2.
• When buying an Xbox 360…trust me…get the extended warranty.  Unless you live next door to Bill Gates. 
• The moment you find yourself engaged, you’ll notice your closet has a lot more “pink” in it than it used to.  Just roll with it.
• Cocker Spaniels can and do watch TV, and will appear amazed at every second of it.
• It turns out banana peels are slippery.
• Never try to outdrink your uncle using Jack Daniels….there’s a reason he calls it “John”. 

Enjoy the Holiday’s Gang! 

See you in 2009!

I go to get in the check out line and start running through the grocery list in my head, making sure I have everything checked off when I hear the cashier say to the man in front of me:

“Sir, would you like your meat wrapped in plastic?”

Whoa. They must be running a special.

This won’t be a funny one unfortunately. I know right over there in the Salad Bar, it says The Tree will have nothing to do with forcing political views down your throat, and trust me, we won’t.

But frankly, I have to say, its simply appalling what this Country has turned into when it comes to politics. People have turned it into the Super Bowl. Its nothing but mud-slinging and trash talk about either candidate and/or their party.

Look, the truth of the matter is this: Bush isn’t the Devil, Obama isn’t the Messiah. They’re politicians. Their word can only be taken AFTER they’ve followed through on what they promise. That happens very rarely. They’re professional liars who make a living telling the public EXACTLY what they want to hear.

Unfortunately, it seems like people have become so easily fooled that they follow these political leaders with a cult-like frenzy. Taking up name calling and slander as their banner into what’s become a verbal war. I can’t tell you how many blogs I’ve read in the last day and half that feature Sarah Palin’s report card from High School. HIGH SCHOOL. Really? You mean the time when 90% of the students are going through their own personal hell (read: puberty) and have to deal with growing up, studying and finding their selves? How absolutely absurd. If Governor Palin’s report card from High School is to be used against her, then get Obama, Bidan and McCain’s up there. In fact, let’s get EVERYONE’s report card up there? Conservative and Liberal.

Guys, it’s time to fuckin’ grow up. We need to allow people to make their own decisions when it comes to politics, religion and really, anything else. Nothing makes one person more right than someone else when it comes to our own personal views, and lowering ourselves to this “he said, she said” bullshit in politics just makes us look like a bunch of screaming idiots.

I CAN NOT WAIT until November 5th. I simply can’t. Whoever becomes president, I just would like to once again go about my day and not have someone think of me as such an idiot that I’d be so easily persuaded by what’s written or said in the media.

-Apt1b
(and yes, I am a Conservative)

FOXNEWS.COM HOME

22-Year-Old Auctions Off Virginity to Pay for College
Wednesday, September 10, 2008

A 22-year-old college grad looking to pay off her student loans will auction off her virginity at Nevada’s infamous Moonlight Bunny Ranch, Us magazine reported.
The Sacramento State grad, who uses the pseudonym “Natalie Dylan,” told “The Insider” she is “ready for the controversy.”
“I don’t think auctioning my virginity will solve all my problems, but it will create some financial stability,” she said, according to the magazine.
Dylan was turned down by eBay, and shock-jock Howard Stern denied reports he has a hand in the stunt.
“Through this process I’m not just looking for the highest bidder,” she said, Us magazine reported. “I’m looking for someone who is a genuine, overall nice person.”
Dylan said she is willing to undergo a medical exam, and took a polygraph to prove she is a virgin.
Click here to read more on this story from Us magazine.

Okay, there are just so many things that make me cringe in this article, but lets just put it this way:

There’s a time and a place for this sort of thing.
It’s called Match.com

I was looking through the pages and pages of cool LEGO kits (namely Star Wars and Indiana Jones), and noticed they have a new “theme” set for 007 James Bond Spy Missions.

Each kit comes with a Spy character and a vehicle that, much like the 007 movies, is chalk full of gadgets and whatnot. Kinda cool, I guess. But then I came across this page:

Take a closer look at what I have circled here and tell me if you see what I’m seeing.

Are those….

Are those Sharks…with FRICKIN’ laser beams attached to thier foreheads?

Scotty’s on FIRE!

Customer Service: “Yes, so right now you owe the full amount on the invoice”

Me: “Dude….lame….”

CS: “…….”

Me: “So…do you have like a payment plan? I don’t have $400 bucks to just cut
you guys a check”

CS: “Yes sir, we can set that up”

Me: “Great. *sigh*”

Yep, it’s been a great Tuesday.

Here’s the first of the new commercials:

Frankly, I think the commercial is hilarious. But then again, I’m a Seinfeld fan. Fans of the show remember that Seinfeld was a show about nothing.

The reason I bring this up, is because the commercial has been met with a lot of criticism. People were looking to be wowed by the fact that Microsoft was able to get Jerry for their commercials. But Jerry isn’t a wow-er. He’s subtle. He’s cynical. He’s…delicious.

What do you guys think?